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Questions to ask your grandparents

60 questions to ask your grandparents while you still can

The best questions to ask a grandparent are small and concrete: the street they grew up on, the first money they earned, the day they met your grandparent. Ask one at a time, let them wander, and keep the answer in their own voice.

For grandchildren of any age · About an 8-minute read

Grandparents often tell a grandchild things they never told their own children. A question from you can open a story nobody in the family has heard. Here are 60 to choose from, grouped so you can pick the ones that suit your grandparent. Start with one. The rest will keep.

How to ask so they keep talking

Their childhood and the home they grew up in

  1. What is the earliest thing you can remember?
  2. What did the house you grew up in look like? Which room was yours?
  3. What did a normal day look like when you were my age?
  4. What games did you play, and who did you play them with?
  5. What was your favourite food as a child, and who made it?
  6. Were you ever in big trouble? What did you do?
  7. Who was the funniest person in your family when you were small?
  8. What did your parents do for work?
  9. What did you want to be when you grew up?
  10. What was something you were afraid of as a child?

School, friends and growing up

  1. How did you get to school, and how long did it take?
  2. Which teacher do you still remember, and why?
  3. Who was your best friend, and what happened to them?
  4. What music or films did you love as a teenager?
  5. What was the first thing you bought with your own money?
  6. What did your parents not let you do that you did anyway?
  7. What was the biggest change in the world while you were growing up?

Love, marriage and the family they made

  1. How did you meet Grandma (or Grandpa)?
  2. What did you notice first about them?
  3. What was your wedding day like? Was anything unexpected?
  4. Where was your first home together, and what was in it?
  5. What was my mom (or dad) like as a baby?
  6. What was the hardest thing about being a young parent?
  7. What is a family argument you can laugh about now?
  8. What do you think kept your marriage going?

Work, money and hard times

  1. What was your first job, and what did it pay?
  2. What work are you proudest of?
  3. Was there a time money was very tight? How did the family manage?
  4. Who helped you when you were starting out?
  5. What is the hardest decision you ever had to make?
  6. What did you learn from a time things went wrong?
  7. If you could have had any other career, what would it be?

The place they came from

Especially if your grandparents grew up in another country, another state or a village you have never seen.

  1. What was your town or village called, and what was it known for?
  2. Who were the neighbours, and what were they like?
  3. Which festivals did your family celebrate, and how?
  4. What songs or prayers did you learn as a child? Can you sing one for me?
  5. If you moved away, why, and what did you bring with you?
  6. What did you miss most about home after you left?
  7. Which of our family’s traditions came from your parents or grandparents?
  8. What do you know about your own grandparents?
  9. Is there a word or saying from your language that has no English translation?
  10. If I visited your hometown, where should I go first?

What they want you to know

  1. What is the best advice anyone ever gave you?
  2. What do you wish you had known at my age?
  3. What are you most grateful for?
  4. What is something you are proud of that you never talk about?
  5. What makes a good life, looking back?
  6. Which family recipe should someone write down before it is lost?
  7. What do you hope our family is still doing in twenty years?
  8. What would you like your great-grandchildren to know about you?

For young grandchildren to ask

Short and concrete works best for children under ten. Let them ask in their own words, and let the grandparent ask one back.

  1. What toys did you have when you were little?
  2. Did you have a pet? What was its name?
  3. What was your favourite sweet?
  4. What did you do on your birthday?
  5. Were you good at school?
  6. What is the silliest thing you ever did?
  7. What was Mom (or Dad) like when they were my age?
  8. Can you teach me a game you played?
  9. What is your favourite thing about being a grandparent?
  10. What do you want to do together next time we see each other?

Asking at a holiday table? See 30 Thanksgiving questions or 30 Diwali questions, written to be asked with the whole family listening.

If your grandparents live far away

Questions people ask

What are good questions to ask grandparents?

Questions about one specific thing work best: the house they grew up in, their first job, how they met your grandparent, a festival they remember, the best advice they were given. Ask one at a time and follow up with “and then?”.

What should a young child ask their grandparents?

Short, concrete questions about things a child knows: toys, pets, sweets, birthdays, school, and what their mom or dad was like as a child. Let the child ask in their own words.

How do I ask my grandparents about their life without it feeling like an interview?

Ask one question at a time, at an ordinary moment: over a meal, while cooking, looking through photos. A photo on the table makes it a conversation, not an interview.

How can I record my grandparents’ stories?

Ask their permission, then record on your phone, on a video call or as a voice note. Keep the recordings in one shared place so they are not lost when a phone is replaced. Mulam does this every day: it asks one question each morning, your grandparent answers by voice, and the family keeps every answer.

Asking your parents instead? Read 100 questions to ask your parents, or see what Mulam is.